Thinking...... thinking some more...

                        

The week pretty much went by without incident.  A little drama here and a little drama there...  Work was busy but nothing out of the ordinary.  Today was a long day though!

It was raining when I go up and it is still raining now.  Coming down in buckets at times and others just a steady fall.  I actually had to pick up my sister on the way home from work tonight and since she needed an extra 1/2, I just rearranged my schedule and went in a bit late.  Stopped at the Post Office on the way and when I got out of the car I immediately cursed.  I didn't look where I parked and as I stepped out, I promptly landed in a puddle.  Great, a hot foot on the way to work!  I was successful in getting my package sent though, so that's good :)

 

That slight change in hours about killed me.  What a difference a half hour at the end of the day makes.  I suppose the picking my sister and getting her home didn't help as that added on to the end of the day and I didn't get home until almost 6.  Arggghhh  By the time I got home I didn't feel like eating.  Well, I felt like eating but I didn't feel like making anything.  The day had taken it's toll and I was exhausted.  Surely the dark gloom didn't help either.  We ended up doing soup for dinner.  It took the chill off the inside but made me shiver as I was eating it.  Very odd experience!

 

After dinner I was sitting minding my own business when the phone rang.  Must have been really concentrating on the graphic as I jumped about 5 feet off the chair.  It was my nephew calling for a ride.  My sister got her coat and went out the door.  Not two seconds later the phone rang again.  I jumped again thinking it was my nephew calling to tell his mother never mind he found a ride.  I said hello and there was silence.  Well, somewhat silence, I knew someone was there.  Thought to myself, great a telemarketer and was about to hang up when I heard, 'Donna?'  It was my turn to get silent. I knew the voice.  It was a bit softer then I remembered, but I knew it.  I replied with a yes and tried to keep my emotions in check.  It was not a voice I thought I'd hear again so soon.  I normally don't get scared or nervous over interaction with folks, but today I did.  The palms of my hands got sweaty and I swear I heard my heart as it started beating faster and faster.  I even started to shake slightly.  I don't even recall the beginning of the conversation. 

 

When we turned and walked away from each other a couple of weeks ago I thought it would be another twenty years, not less then fifteen days.  After what I assume where pleasantries (I swear I can't even remember) he went on to say how good it was to see me.  How he often wondered, thought, wished, missed.  My head started to spin, I actually felt hot, like I was going to pass out.  He asked if I was mad that called.   I wasn't sure how to answer that.  Mad?  No, not really we shared so much together.  I just didn't know what to say.  I mean he obviously thought about calling for the past two weeks so he had a chance to think things through.  What to say, what not to say.  I was caught completely off guard, and believe it or not speechless! 

 

Even as I sit here I'm at a loss.  What the hell!?!  As we ended the call he asked if he could call this weekend and maybe do something.  Take a ride, get a cup of coffee, just talk for a bit and caught up on our lives.  I thought the best possible answer would be no I didn't think it a good idea, but before I knew it I said sure.  Now I'm not getting a head of myself, or reading anything into it, but damn... twenty years!!!  We'll see what happens if he calls.  I'm thinking I will probably back out.