Tuesday, October 9, 2007

~ Emotional ~

    DsDesignsWhatCancerCantDopurple.gif picture by 55hockeyfan


Hi folks!  I want to start out by apologizing if I was 'short' with anyone, today especially.  It was not a good day.  Full of raw emotions.  No excuse for bad behavior, but I wanted to explain at least a bit.  I stopped at my sisters today.  No Chemo as she is still on break from it.  I picked up a cute little Halloween decoration for her and wanted to drop it off.  Nothing big, just a little pumpkin painted and made up like a spider.  It was cute............   I stayed about an hour and I ached the whole time.  She is in horrible pain, and there is nothing I can do.  Frankly, it F'in sucks!!  She had called the Dr and was waiting on a new prescription for the pain.  She has a pretty high tolerance, so I know it's bad.  She can't get comfortable at all.  Sitting, laying, standing.........  doesn't matter... she is getting very little sleep.  I want to punch something, but we all know it won't help.  Besides, I hit like a girl.  When I was leaving the pharmacy was arriving to drop off the script.  Damn it I hope it helps!  While there she mentioned a slice of warm apple pie with canned milk sounded good.  Pssssttt.. don't tell, but my other sister is off tomorrow so she will put it together and then take it there to bake in her oven.  The smell will hopefully fill the house and cheer her up a bit.  She said she craves things and then when she gets them they don't do the trick.  Maybe smelling the pie will keep the craving alive. 

 

I know I owe tags, but I just couldn't get into this evening.  I tried.  I will get them out tomorrow.  I sat here and played with the above graphic.  I love the saying even though I don't always believe it.  Well, that's not true.  I do, but I have weak times.  I did it in purple for her.  That's the color for pancreatic cancer.  Then decided to do pink in case someone wanted it that way.  Feel free to snag.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Ahhh the Bills game last night.  There were a few arrests, lots of Dallas fans.   LOL  I found that pretty funny.  Suppose they were upset?  The fact that a team playing a rookie QB who only had one other start in NFL?  The fact the defense had 3rd, 4th, and 5th stringers playing?  The fact that the spread was some where around 14-17 points?  And they almost lost?  Upsetting?  Yeah I think that would do it.    Our coach made some pretty bone head calls.  Who calls for a pass on third down when you are on the 14 yard line with 4 minutes to go and you are winning?  Run the ball, get some more yards if you can, if no first down kick the field goal.  GRRRRRRRRR  whatever, a genius he is not.  I've heard some comments that Romo made... para phrasing...  'we'll only lose to Buffalo if I go over the Falls.'  WTF!?!?!  He just made it real hard for me to cheer against New England next week.  Pompous ass!!  I know what I will be cheering for, but I'm a lady and will keep it to myself.  :::evil grin:::  So anyway, the Bills may have blew it last night, but the defense rose to the occasion and made it a game.  An exciting game.  Some folks here are upset, others are glad they played hard.......   No one went thought the Bills would even be in the game let alone almost winning it. 

 

Gonna try to get some sleep.  If my mind will stop jumping all over....... hope you all had a better day

 

Hugs

~d


 

       DsDesignsWhatCancerCantDopink.gif picture by 55hockeyfan


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51 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hugs to you..  I know its very painful to see someone you love in so much pain.  
It is REALLY, REALLY hard.  I went through it with my dad.  Hang in there.  I will include you and your sister in my prayers tonight.  Hugs - Julie

Anonymous said...

Words escape me---so I just want to send (((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))) to you...and of course prayers are always being said for your sister....
I was screaming my head off for Buffalo---they put up such a great game and should be quite proud....
take care
Ellie

Anonymous said...

I tell ya... the Bills did pretty darn good last night.  Romo is an ass.  

I am so sorry that your sister is suffering.  Your frustration has got to be awful... I am sending you hugs {{{ Donna }}} and prayers and love.  I hope your other sis' visit will be good for all tomorrow, and the meds will work.

be well,
Dawn
http://journals.aol.com/princesssaurora/CarpeDiem/

Anonymous said...

I can imagine how you feel Donna and it hurts so so much.I nursed my dad with cancer for seven yrs.He used to fancy things to eat too.I finally found the only thing he realy enjoyed was porridge and he never felt sick or anything after eating it. I used to ache and cry all the time when I left him to go home.I do hope your sis can get some comfort from the meds.Prayers continuing to be said.Take Care God Bless Kath
astoriasand http://journals.ao.co.uk/astoriasand/MYSIMPLERHYMES

Anonymous said...

It can be so frustrating to have a loved one go battle a serious illness.  I know I lost my cool many, many times while my mom suffered.  It's just so unfair.  I hope your sister and YOU have much better days ahead.

hugs,
Russ

Anonymous said...

((((Donna)))) hugs to you.  I pray for your sister daily.  I'll say an extra one for you tonite.  Sorry to hear she is in so much pain.
Hugs,
D

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry your Sis is not doing too good. It is so hard on you and other family members, but she is trying to be strong and get through this evil Illness and with you all helping and supporting her  it will give her strength to beat it. If it makes you feel easier punch that wall or pillow on second thoughts punch the pillow it wont do you any good hurting your hand. lol Keep your chin up my friend your sis is in our Prayers .
Love and big hugs.
Katie

Anonymous said...

Of course, I lite a candle for your sis.

It was truly and exciting game...I was on the edge of my seat until the very end!  The Bills did a terrific job...one of the best games a I've seen in yrs.  They did good...all those injuries....they did real good.

take care, hon     Bethe

Anonymous said...

((((donna))))))
your tags are beautiful and the idea of cooking the pie there just might help her with being able to eat some of it. and I bet the smell will give her a little comfort too.  

I love it when and underdog wins.  even if my team isn't the the underdog...
take care
tina

Anonymous said...

I am so late on my alerts, I am starting from the top. I hope the meds worked on ur Sis, I still squirm seeing my Dad suffer, I just hope it stays away from him now.

Cheer up me girl, I hate watching others suffer while you look on hopelessly too.

Gaz xxxxxxx

Anonymous said...

My heart goes out to your sister and you. It is a terrible feeling to feel helpless when a loved one is in pain. My best wishes are with you and your sister.
Hugs, Maria

Anonymous said...

Prayers for ur sister and all of u that are affected by her illness.

Anonymous said...

It is terrible to see someone you love in so much pain I feel for you girl.
You lost me on the game was that hockey or american football lol I have real trouble keeping up lol.
Debbie
xxx

Anonymous said...

So sorry your sister is going through this,
it is so unfair taht she suffers so.
You are such a sweet sister to her,always thinking what she might like.
Many prayers for you both.

Anonymous said...

Donna I am so sorry ....life is not fair at times.  A prayer is being said for your sister right now.

Hugs

Mari

Anonymous said...

I feel so sad for you and your sister, I watched my mother suffer with cancer and it just leaves you feeling helpless. There can't be anything worse than watching a loved one suffer. Don't worry about tags, we can wait. I hope the pain meds are working for your sister now so she can at least get comfortable. Just know you're in my prayers. Jeannette xx  

Anonymous said...

It must be so hard to watch your sister in pain ,I hope her new meds give her some relief ,of course I continue to pray for her ,and you ....love Jan xx

Anonymous said...

Donna
I am sorry your sister is in so much discomfort.  I will pray that the new meds help her feel better.  That is nice of your other sister to bring over the pie today.  I hope she likes it.
Sam

Anonymous said...

I am so so sorry for the pain your sister is suffering.  Its not fair and isn't right...  I hope she finds some relief soon.  Linda

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

I am going now to light another candle for your dear sister...and praying for her, and for you.  There are so many bad days in cancer, but the support and love of families and friends, we can only hope helps...also our prayers to God.  May her day today...and yours be a better one...many hugs Donna...and love to you both.
Joyce

Anonymous said...

So many people i know have cancer right now and are struggling.  Will light a candle for your sister and say some prayers.  Hope the new medication helps her.  I think the Bills should be commended for their valiant plays.  My son was there and he loved it.  Got home very late and went to work all day.  He is zonked out  now, lol.

Anonymous said...

Your sister continues to be in all our thoughts, Donna. Why not go into a wood or something and scream at the trees? Sounds daft, but it may offer a bit of relief :-)

Anonymous said...

You know I jave your sweet sister in my prayers & light candles for her. Also praying for the rest of the family to stay strong thriugh this difficult time.
I love the tag, if there was in peach (uterine ca) & smaller...I woulda snagged for my side bar. But it's beautiful I know many will snag it.
Have a beautiful day, hope sister enjoys her apple pie.
Hugs,
Sugar

Anonymous said...

Donna,

I'm sorry your sister is in such pain.  I'm also sorry it hurts you to watch, and not be able to help.  

May God give you both strength, courage, faith, mercy and grace...always.

Cyberhugs for you and your family,

Cindy

P. S.  Hope the apple pie aroma will make her smile, and keep her hungry for it.

Anonymous said...

i love you D.....ALWAYS thinking of you and praying for your sister. It is OK if you are short with us....me.....we are friends and friends understand that. To think your sis is in pain hurts me....i PRAY that med helped her. I wanna give you a hug. We all can use a hug sometimes. One day at a time......love you always,
lj

Anonymous said...

OH hunny, *hugs* First off im so sorry i wasnt here sooner. Things have been crazy here and not so good the past few days. But then i see what ur going thru, ur sister my heart breaks so much for her, for u. Im so sorry. i wish i had better conforting words. But if u ever need some1 to listen to well read ur venting i mean really, lol, let me know. I am always told i am good at that. I am praying soo hard for ur sister. i cant fathom at all being in pain like that, not being able to function that way, sleep, i just am so worried and saddened for her. I know she is stronger then she thinks though and she will fight. I know ur fighting this long with her as well. That tag u made above there is beautiful i will snag it. I was going to request for the last one. But didnt know if im too late for it. Thats ok hun no worries. U have so much on ur plate right now. Sorry about ur Bills too hun :( Chin up hunny. Take care, i pray so hard u have a better day and ur sis does too. I pray harder those pain meds work and the apple pie smell makes her happy. Take car ehun, Love yah, Leslie

Anonymous said...

((((Donna & sister))))....

I truly know how you are feeling as well as many others. Please remember you can vent all you want to. It is truly unfair for the pain...this I know...and it really sucks that as a family member you can't make it go away. I understand this...I used to rub and rub my MIL (can you say nervous tendencies).

Prayers always....

Michele

Anonymous said...

Good Morning Donna ~

So many of us understand what ALL of you are going through right now!  I will keep prayers coming for everyone ~ it is not easy to watch your loved ones suffer!

In my heart, thots & prayers always!

Hugs & blessings ~ Lois B

Anonymous said...

My thoughts & Prayers are with you & your sister.  I know how you feel - it does suck, big time.
hugs,
Lisa

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

Donna, I'm so sorry to hear that your sister is facing this battle!  Prayers are being said for her.  I hate cancer!  Runs in my family.  Hoping she can eat something that she likes and it's delicious :)  Carla

Anonymous said...

I continue to pray for your sister and the strength you all need to get through this horrible time.  The graphic is beautiful D.  Be strong.  

Anonymous said...

Hi Donna,

Once again, I'm keeping her and your family in my prayers.  I'm so sorry to hear she is having so much pain and is so uncomfortable.....there is no excuse for the doctor not to give her something strong enough to ease her pain.  My dear neighbor who had pancreatic cancer had to try several kinds of medicine, but they finally found something that worked for her.  I can't begin to imagine what you're feeling.....I'm very close to both of my sisters, so I know the strong bond.  I hope the new medicine helps her.  I'm always here for you if you need a shoulder....  I love the tags you made, they are exceptional!  I sent the pink one to my friend I mentioned in the email a couple of days ago.  I told her you made it.

Take Care,
~Bilinda~

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry your sister is in so much pain. I pray that god will help her through this. And i knoow it has to be so hard on you seeing her in so much pain. So I pray God helps you too sweety. God is still a miracle working God. I know because my 17 month old neice was shot straight through her little head by a hunters stray bullet. They siad she had 10% chance of making it. But with lots of prayers she went home from the hospital in 12 days. She is 6 now and doing fine. So yes God is still a miracle working God.
                                                                     Love Mammaw

Anonymous said...

stealing the pink one. I have this on my page but not like this
I'm praying for your sister for some relief. It does suck. I'm smelling that baked apple pie. mmmmmmmmmmm. Hit like ya boys if ya have to. Sorry about the Bills they almost had it. Off to lite my candle.
have a great evening

Anonymous said...

Hoping your sister finds relief and comfort soon ~ Thoughts, prayers and a lit candle is an, Always. Take care of you and yours,
Katie

Anonymous said...

can't decide, so I took both tags.tx

Anonymous said...

Ohhh, I am so sorry to hear that you sister is in so much pain..and you don't have to apologize for anything...
Hope the treat works.....
Hugs and good thoughts for all of you,
Sheri

Anonymous said...

Just stopping by to say hello & hang in there.

Gab

Anonymous said...

The Tag is beatiful.  I feel so sorry for your sister and I did light a candle for her. :)
http://journals.aol.com/mrsm711/LatteDah/   Tracy

Anonymous said...

Awwwwww Donna sending up healing prayers for your sister, Hugs Lisa

Anonymous said...

It's so ironic you posted that saying.  
When my mom was diagnosed with cancer a couple weeks ago, we were both crying on the phone one day and she read that to me.  My uncle Jeff had brought it to her and she sobbed as she read it.

It's touching.  

D....the empathy I feel for you and your sister is tremendous.  It must be horrifying watching your sister struggle this way.  I think it's wonderful you try and bring her anything and everything she wants though.  You're the bestest sister.  

I'll keep her (and you) in my prayers.  

Love ya,
Bridgett

Anonymous said...

 I snagged the purple one for my MIL as she has pancreatic cancer also.  Thanks for doing this.  I am going to run it off and bring it to her.

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

My heart is aching for you and the pain tha tyou are going though.  My prayers are with you.  Linda

Anonymous said...

((((((((Donna)))))) does your sister get shots to build up her red and white blood cell counts? I got those shots while doing chemo and those shots make every bone, muscle and even your hair hurt. my doctor gave me 10mg percosets, they only helped if i took 4 to 6 of them a day. now i am craving an apple pie, lol. Sorry the Bills didn't win. I myself don't like Dallas Cowboys. (((((((((hugs)))))
Love,
Cindy

Anonymous said...

My cancer gets pretty painful at times too...Norco (stronger than vicodin 10mgs) It's worth a try.

Anonymous said...

I am so sory that you and your familyhave to watch your sis suffer as she does...I too had to watch my daddy...so I know..I know well....I am praying.
love ya,
carlene

Anonymous said...

I snagged both beautiful graphics thank you!
Donna this entry brings me to tears, brings back so many memories of my Aunt Judy suffering in pain...and i remember all to well that feeling of wanting to hit something...but more so the feeling of wanting to scream WHY!!!!! To this day i still do not know why our loved ones must suffer so much and why there can't be a cure for cancer yet....I agree it F'ing sucks!!!

Keeping your sister and you and your family in my thoughts and prayers....hope her pain eases soon and she can get some much needed rest.

Big Hugs!
Terri