It's kind of funny

As I went searching through my discs from my old computer looking for pictures of my son I found some old writings.  They are from years gone by, old emails, old 'poems' if you can call them that.  Things I knew I had, but pushed way back in my mind and heart as I didn't think I'd be able to look at them.  I thought for sure if I ever went to 'that place' again I'd be grief stricken, paralyzed with hurt, pain, and anger.  Those little tid bits of writings were meant for someone so close to me at the time.  They will recognize them if they see them, and will know without a doubt when and where they were sent.   

A six year relationship gone up in a smoke without notice.  A disconnected phone, a change of address, email undeliverable, quitting of a job.  Never to be seen or heard from again.  Others contacting me to find them.  To no avail, gone, poof, like the smoke that filters from a blown out candle.  Swirling in the air until it is dissipated and all that is left is the faint scent and a memory.  

That was a couple years ago, and amazingly enough as I read through the words the other day I took my hand to my cheek expecting to find a tear, a dry type tear as I didn't feel it rolling down my cheek, but nothing.  I continued to read and so many thoughts flooded into my head.  They didn't make me sad, but happy for what was.  Looking back I see how much I've grown during and after that time.  How much happier I am, how much more vibrant, how I've opened my soul that you taught me was a good soul, to the world.  The time and energy you took to peel back the layers to reveal my inner self that had been hidden for so long.  

If you ever happen upon this, thank you!  Thank you for letting me learn to dance to the beat of my drum!