Emotions

It's been so weird the last few weeks.  My emotions have been on a wild roller coaster ride and I've yet to figure it out.  Not sure if I really want to, and I am not even sure it is a bad thing.  I find myself overwhelmed at times and tears just flow.  Not heavy sobbing tears, just the emotional ones that well up in your eyes and trickle down your cheek.  I've always been the sentimental type and could cry over a silly commercial with kids and animals.  This is almost an extension of that I think, but it's for all different reasons. 

 

You are supposed to cry at weddings, or that's what they say, but I usually don't.  I did this past wedding.  Not sobbing, but I did get all teary eyed as I watched the bride dance with her dad.  Trish is the niece of my brother in law and I barely know her.  It was odd to have that reaction.  I thought it must be because my niece will be married in Feb and I fast forwarded my heart. 

 

I've read journals and had tears flow and some weren't even sad entries.  They just touched me in a way I can't explain.  I've read articles about strangers in the paper and tears flowed.  One comes to mind that I recently read about a local boy who has been signed by the local hockey team.  It was a feel good story about 'local boy makes good' and will be giving it his all to live out his dream, tears flowed.  When JP signed with another team, even though I knew it was going to happen, I cried. 

 

The other night I had a conversation about some things in my past.  Not all bad things, but happy times too.  When I was done I had tears in my eyes.  For no reason.  It didn't hurt to talk about them, it didn't even seem to phase me.  After, I felt overwhelmed, and I can't figure out if it was because I was glad to talk about it or something else.  It was nice sharing the stories, so I don't get it. 

 

It's not about sadness, it is not depression, I couldn't be happier.   I feel as though something was lifted from my soul, my heart to set me free.  A door opened and I walked through it and I now have the ability to let emotions out.  I've never really been a 'cold' person, but this is so different.  I laugh as I cry because I find it humorous that I'm reacting the way I am.  It feels good, feels so right.  Feels so sappy!  LOL

 

Then on the way home from work today I heard a song that I haven't heard in a very long time.  It's always been one that I sang to, off key and all, but today I cried.  A good cry.... and I wonder......

 

 

                 

 

Landslide
(Stevie Nicks)

 

I took my love and I took it down
Climbed a mountain and turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow-covered hills
'Til the landslide brought it down

Oh, mirror in the sky

-What is love?
-Can the child within my heart rise above?
-Can I sail through the changin' ocean tides
-Can I handle the seasons of my life?
I don't know

Well I've been afraid of changin'
Because I've built my life around you
But time makes you bolder, even children get older
And I'm getting older too

So, take my love, take it down
Climb a mountain and turn around
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well the landslide will bring it down

And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Well the landslide will bring itdown
The landslide will bring it down